What is Red-y... A Promise to Purity?

I, along with some very close friends, have decided to make some commitments/promises to Purity and the many forms it can take. This blog is a tool which members, readers and participants can use to help with accountability, encouragement and asking questions. It is my desire to chronicle this journey's highs and lows... Failures and victories alike. I'd like to revisit these entries once goals are reached... And ultimately share the success stories with all who care to hear in hopes to inspire them as well.

The small group of us has decided to wear a red accessory as a physical reminder of our Promise to Purity. Many have chosen to do this to better serve, honor, and trust in God. We have decided our own Promises based on individual needs that include specific goal(s), time frame, and purposes. If you feel comfortable sharing, please include this information in your first entry.



"Love does not live alone"

Jeff

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Week one- Introduction, Jeff

This being my first entry, I'd like to introduce myself and share my purpose for making a promise to purity.
Background: I grew up, on my own choosing, to live as a 'Perfectionist Christian'... Believing I needed to live a perfect life according to biblical teachings. I struggled at forgiving myself whenever I didn't do so. Eventually, I turned away as I constantly felt guilty and wanted to relieve the pressure of living a perfect life. These ideals followed me through college, a 5 year NFL career, owning a fitness club, and doing some fitness modeling. I have been involved in several unsuccessful relationships. The constant failure of relationships has disheartened me to the point of believing that any chance at a happy marriage would never happen for me. Consequently, I accepted that idea and have since led a life of mediocrity...settling for superficial relationships. This pattern kept me from any meaningful relationships and ultimately from what my heart truly desires...a relationship with one woman for the rest of my life.

Purpose: It is my intention, my promise to purity, to remain outside of any dating relationship until July 4th, 2011. Obviously this includes any sexual, emotional, mental involvement with another woman. I will reassess at that time, but it is sure to include similar promises. My focus will be on changing my pattern of living/ dating. I plan to focus on becoming a more complete man... A man who a woman will be proud to call her husband. It is my hope that God is preparing a woman in the same manner. One day, when my wife and I cross paths, I pray I am ready.

What I need: Most of all, I need accountability as I am unable to do this on my own. I created this blog to gain support, encourage like-minded friends, and to hold each of us accountable. I will check in from time to time to discuss challenges and successes and perhaps failures as well as read other's posts. I will be brutally honest and ask the same from anyone who commits to this. There are no set rules, I just ask that this blog be used as a tool to better our lives and help each one of us receive the desires of our heart!

That is me, that is where I'm at, that is my heart.

I will also use a scale of 1-10 to describe how I'm doing with all of this...as it's sure to be extremely challenging and rewarding at times. Today, after 5 days of committing to this, I'm at a 7. I excited about my promise to purity, but struggling with confidence that I can actually make it to July 4th.

Many of us have decided to wear a red accessory to remind us of our promise. I wear a red band around my wrist as my reminder, FYI.

Hope to hear from others soon!

Jeff

11 comments:

  1. Good job BFF! I'm proud of you!

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  2. Jeff - this takes a lot of courage (balls) to share and it is not going to be an easy road. I don't think the right roads are usually easy. In the Marines we used to say that the only easy day was yesterday. I'll commit to support you in any way that I can. I've got your back. -Mike

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  3. Jeff - I am so proud of you! This really takes a lot of courage. Your faith is strong and will get you through this.

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  4. You have an incredible heart, and will reach each and every goal you set for yourself in life. Allow your heart to lead you. Your head will follow, with some difficulty at first, but soon it will settle in on that same goals. I believe in you and miss you greatly.

    Amanda

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  5. I have no doubt you can do this! You deserve happiness and i hope this helps you find it.

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  6. Whoa! I am so mind-blowingly proud of you, my brother! To be so intentional about setting aside immediate gratification in sake of her; to value your future wife so much, you would take the proactive steps to bring her the best man you can be. I haven't met her yet but I can't wait to give her a big hug and let her know how blessed she is to have met a man like you and how treasured she will be in your heart. You are a stone-cold inspiration! Stick to it, my brother! ...and remember, you are not alone:

    Matthew 19:26 Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

    Ken

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  7. Jeff, that is an amazing commitment! I, too, am trying to be a better husband, father, and Christian (specifically Catholic), and it is often difficult to do the right thing all the time. First, we must be able to forgive, ourselves and others. And, if I read you correctly, you have come to the understanding that we are all flawed; achieving perfection is not possible. We just do the best we can each day. Thanks for inspiring me, as well.

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  8. So so so proud. You can do this, only by His strength.
    So excited for the journey!

    'The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.' Exodus 14:14

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  9. Jeff!
    Blown away by this. A challenge to all of us single guys who claim to follow Christ. I am so excited for you to potentially find the woman you will spend the rest of your life with and even more excited about the statement it makes about who and what is most important in your life. At your side.

    However, I consider my life worth nothing to me; my only aim is to finish the race and complete the task the Lord Jesus has given me—the task of testifying to the good news of God’s grace. Acts 20:23-25

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  10. The fact that you put yourself out there, admitting that you too are a flawed man....left me speechless. I give you my prayers that you will do this, for if your desire is one woman for the rest of your life, without knowledge of yourself and how you play a role in the relationship, this such desire will always be left unfulfilled.

    I am here for you.....your accountability partner in the gym.

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  11. Wow! I truly admire your commitment. This is NOT and easy task but with God and support from those who love you...you can get it done! YAY 4 you :-)

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